Education Education Education-what was he on about?

Tony Blair has banged on about education for all and made a huge statement with these damning words 'education, education, education'. It's very easily said and perhaps understood by some but doesn't this vary from individual to individual and from society to society?

There are many issues involved in defining the term education. In general, education is defined as going to school, then university or college and thereafter getting a job. Obviously, passing of exams reflects how clever an individual is. However, do exams reflect how intelligent a person is or have we as a society attached a label to it? It needs to be noted that some people are 'academically' bright. By this, I mean they are enthused by learning theory at schools and study hard for exams and then pass getting pretty high grades. On the other hand, it needs to be brought to attention that academically intelligent people may lack intelligence in other fields. Have you ever thought of that? For example, a person who gets high grades for exams may not have the social skills required for the 'real world'. So doesn't this mean that their studies were a waste of time? Do we have to study really hard and get good grades to get the title 'intelligent'? After all, if we look at historical figures, did they go to school? Did inventors start like this? These are the questions we need to ask ourselves.

For me, as a student at postgraduate level, I have met many people from around the world. From this experience I have learned that the way intelligence is measured in this contemporary society is something to be concerned about. From medical doctors to cleaning staff, I have met a range. From this, I can conclude that the way intelligence is measured in society is worrying. People with degrees are working in areas which has no relevance to their subject area and people are constantly being employed for reasons other than their academic qualifications. Therefore, are academic institutions preparing us for the big bad world? An answer we can get from looking at what is happening around us. I personally think that 'intelligence' is measured in the wrong way. After all, academic qualifications are purely based on gaining a title which sticks with us wherever we go but our minds are continuously picking up information, ideas, you name it..from people we meet and engage with. In addition, countries where there is no formal insitution to teach doesn't mean that the people in that society are uneducated but perhaps more educated as they have to gain skills without any form of guidance from 'so-called' professionsl bodies which, let's face it, aren't always the most brightest.

THE ANCIENT ART of BELLY DANCE-AN ART SUBJECT TO EXPLOITATION?

Belly dance is an ancient dance performed by folks in the olden days! This dance was associated with fertility and is no way what it is today. The art has been compared with other styles of 'entertainment' such as lap dancing and strip tease and has perhaps been stripped of its culture by this current society. Many people are beginning to learn the art of belly dance but hold on! Is it an art? Or merely a degrading dance for women to perform for all those drooling men whom by the way, pay to watch!

Just a few years back, belly dance wasn't so popular as it is today. So how did it become so popular? Well, lets see. What influences people in society the most? Yes, celebrities. Since the latin star Shakira popped onto our screens, this changed the views of many youngsters about the dance or at least contibuted to it. The art was changed into a seductive dance which I must say can't be blamed due to the music industry's exploitation of the authentic dance. More recently, Britain's Got Talent featured a belly dancer in the semi final stage. This popularised it further but the main target for attention were men! So therfore, we could say it should be compared to other forms of entertainment (for men). Ummm...get the drift?

Many have probably seen traditional belly dancing when on holidays to Egypt, Morrocco and Turkey and of course the styles vary. From earthy balladi moves in Egypt to the feminine flowy moves in Turkey. This is an art in it's own right. So, lets talk technicality! The moves predominantly come from the hips and the whole discipline lies in the isolation of the different moves. It is a dance that needs concentration and gradual building. Professionals such as the 'belly dance superstars' offer a seductive but elegant angle to the art from the well known shimmy to the more controlled belly rolls. It is not what it is becoming today.

So basically, the moral of the story is, keep art as art and lets not change it into something cheap. Appreciate it as a culture and lets not turn it into something subject to exploitation.

INDECENT PROPOSAL - South Asian Marriages Today

Back in the good old days, elders would recommend boys and girls of marital age to someone they knew who would be suitable for them. Solely parents and close contacts of parents would do this. Sounds straightforward and it probably was as there was this trust and closeness amongst communities. However, this most certainly isn't the case nowadays.

South Asian parents look for the most suitable partner for their sons and daughters, taking into consideration various factors that may be deemed as shallow in Western society such as level of education, religious awareness, what ethnic group they're from, employment background and so on and so forth. Of course, these factors vary due to individual definitions. Parents look for what they think is right for their children and reject what they dislike. However, this is very different when they recommend someone for another person's son or daughter. Basically, they lower their standards! Yes, very shallow indeed. You would think they would put themselves in another parent's shoes but no, not these days. It's each for their own. It doesn't matter who they're son or daughter marry so long as they're children have got the best. Selfish I hear you think? Well it is. Trust has gone out the window and as far as I'm concerned shoved where the sun don't shine. So-called friends of the family are no longer friends but are self absorbed individuals out to get what they can. When a partner is recommended by someone whom by the way, barely knows the family, parents feel obliged to enquire purely on the ground of 'saving face'. They are continuously put in this situation by know it alls meddling in other people's private lives.

Such individuals are creating a divide or perhaps adding to the divide in this once loving, close knit community. Recommendations of prospective partners for 'arranged marriages' are unworthy of consideration but are indecently chosen with no regard for compatibility.

A WOMAN'S ROLE IN SOCIETY - Do we REALLY have a place today?

For centuries, women have moaned and often rightfully struggled for rights. But what exactly do we mean by rights? What is equality? I am a woman and I don't believe women have rights regardless of many claiming them to be making their own choices in education, work and relationships.

Nevertheless, I believe rights have been given but they have also been taken away. Let's start with the constant media exploitation of women today. Women think they are doing certain things such as modelling, getting cosmetic surgery, the latest fashion, the career etc etc and making the decisions themselves. However, little do we know that these are not our choices but are the choices made by money and power hungry men who are behind all this subliminal messages sent out to us all, dressed up as something it most certainly is not. 'Choice for women'? Yeah right! Exploitation of women has moved from direct and obvious stereotyping and labelling to the more damaging yet subtle exploitation through the clever use of newspapers, magazines television and radio.

So why do so many women think they are doing what they want? Are they? Really? Take a look at your life now, what is it that is making you happy and what isn't? You will find that following the constant whispers of society's norm is dictating your life without you even realising it. Women are the prime targets for exploitation due to their fragile nature and their never-ending quest to conform to the ever-changing demands of society losing sight of reality and what is really important to them. Women are going from caring individuals to superficial beings, from humans to robots, from women to puppets controlled by the individuals we are so desperate to get respect from...MEN. However, this respect will never be gained if we as women do not empower ourselves and respect ourselves.

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ARRANGED, LOVE OR DERANGED MARRIAGE? Who decides? What is it Really?

Lets face it, we have all heard of an arranged marriage yeah? So why is there so much confusion in understanding this in Western society. Doesn't the word speak for itself? Is it our white counterparts confused about this term and practice or have we as British Asians confused the concept? WHO IS MISUNDERSTANDING WHO? This is the million dollar question. As a British born Asian, some may say I'm confused but I'd like to call it 'balanced'. Huh? Again, different words for the same issue. Why is that as Asians, we can't seem to agree on what an arranged marriage is? After all, we all have them or know of someone who has had one. Lets start with me. I am a graduate and currently studying on a masters level AND at the same time studying the new art of listening to constant whispers about my...wait for it...MARRIAGE. This I find strange and difficult to digest.

My parents want look for someone for me but others say I need find someone myself so does this mean my parents want an arranged marriage and others want a love marriage for me? If I find someone myself for marriage, am I in love? Does this make it a love marriage although technically speaking I'm not in love? However, if my parents choose a potential partner for me and want me to meet him and talk to him, does that make it an arranged marriage because ultimately I'm getting to know him aren't I so doesn't that change the concept? In the past, arranged marriages were easily understood and practised. Elders, wise people, heck, whatever you wanna call them, would find a suitable match based on status, education and religion and therafter the couple would marry. Easy huh? So why are we complicating this by adding more and more and more to the concept and making it suit our individual purpose.

Scenario 1: "I'm getting married to someone who someone recommended to my parents. Oh right, so how did this come about? oh, I've known him for awhile. eh?" Scenario 2: "I wanna get married to someone I met in Uni. Oh right, so have you been seeing each other long? No, it's not like that. We thought it makes sense to get married as we know each other and we're at the age." OK! Enough of the scenarios. These are examples I have heard myself from the horses' mouths so it's not made up. This spread of confusion has made arranged marriage and love marriage in Asian culture impossible to define and separate. So I introduce to you, the newly created and most appropriately named DERANGED MARRIAGE. I bet this makes more sense now. No room for confusion now. Just think, it's two in one. We don't need to hover between the two when telling people what kind of marriage we had. It's the modern, hip and up and coming word.

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THE HYPOCRISY of SOUTH ASIAN FAMILIES - Do women have chance?

The media has depicted women in Asian culture as being oppressed and dominated by male chauvinists. However, how much truth is in this perception of Asians in Britain? Are women suffering behind closed doors or has the media targeted them for aimless reasons?

As a British born Asian woman, I have observed from childhood the on goings of an Asian family in terms of the level of honour required for the functioning of the ‘extended family’. In my childhood if I recall correctly, it was fine I guess. However, reflecting back I seem to remember certain events that have perhaps made me the person I am today...bitter and twisted! Yes, I admit it. Coming from a family of five children in total, I have observed the hypocrisy of the men and WOMEN of such families in the sense that equality doesn’t exist. Yes, that’s right-it does not exist! The underlying reason for this is because the mothers of the family rear their children differently and a fault of each child is never concealed. For example, if you’re not a clever child, trust me they’ll let you know! And, if you are a clever child, you and everyone will know! There is no such thing as political correctness or sensitivity in an Asian family! Boys and girls are treated very differently with boys being loved and weighted on 24/7 and girls expected to stay quiet and obey. This seems quite harsh in this staying age but it most definitely happens but in a more subtle way. Example: a daughter/sister can study, work and go out (going out limited of course) and similarly a son/brother does the same however, the difference lies in the additional responsibilities required for each sex. Women: as an ancient sociologist has found, have a dual/triple shift whereas men...ZILCH.

Asian girls are expected to be educated to degree level, have had a good level of work experience and at the same time committed to household responsibilities and childcare if children are involved. Furthermore, they are always ALWAYS carrying the weight of the world and have to maintain the family honour. By this, I mean behaving like a good respectable woman, dressing appropriately, going to events with their mothers, cooking and cleaning etc. Men on the other hand can relax after a ‘hard day’s work’. Why is that a woman who works the same hours as a man, is treated differently? Why does an Asian woman have to work, study and then come home to do household duties? And, why is that men are fed hand to mouth by their parents when they return? How did this come about? Are we as women to blame? YES! We as women have burdened ourselves and created these selfish humans, rearing them to depend on us and in return getting constant criticisms and reminders of how disappointing we are.

OK, so where does hypocrisy come into all this? Well, Asians are born with dual standards. Basically, one rule for them and another for the WOMEN around them. Now, this isn’t just about men having double standards but women supporting such standards, namely, MOTHERS! Without demonising anyone in particular I’d like to cut to the chase. Daughters are expected in this contemporary society to learn how to do everything! But, when it comes to them wanting to pursue their interests, cultural norms come into play and in a nutshell a woman is put in her place with lines such as ‘it’s not right for young girls to do this, what will people say, it’s not safe’ etc and then marriage comes into play. Yes, another factor! ‘If you want to pursue your interests then get married and your husband will help you’. WHAT?

Women in Asian culture are allowed and often do what they want with limitations set by parents. However, this happens only when it suits everyone else in the family. The bottom line is women do not have the respect in society as a whole and in Asian family it is apparent as it’s blatantly pointed out. As a woman gets older in Asian culture, she becomes a burden on her family if she does not get married. Basically, families outgrow you! Shocking huh? But, that’s the brutal truth. Parents love their children but in this modern society, the concealed suffering of women continues. Asian families favour their sons’ interests more and disregard the interests of their daughters’ due to it being an inconvenience for the community as a whole. The expectations set by an Asian family are mainly for the daughters to live up to but not so much for the sons. This is the hypocrisy of Asian families present today.

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